This time last year my brother and I had been back to see Mum, had a meeting with the hospital and were expecting that Dad had a few weeks to live.
We told the family that he was dying. Some of his briothers asked if
they should visit. We said that if they really wanted to, that would be
fine, but he wouldn't know they were there and it would be very
distressing. We reassured them that it was fine for them not to come.
We travelled home on the Friday night, planning to go up again a few days later (on the Tuesday).
One of the Ward sisters told Mum that we should "come tomorrow" (Sunday I thnk it was) as she didn't think Dad would last until the Tuesday. Dad had Sepsis on top of everything else. We travelled back to Wales on the 7th. One uncle, the one we live nearest to and who had come with us before Christmas, decided he would come. He did it to be supportive, and it was lovely of him.
When we got to the hospital we we were shocked to find that Dad was distressed and obviously in pain. I went to find someoneto get help. We were told it wasn't possible without signoff, nothing was on his notes. e asked who we could speak to, and eventually a Registrar arrived. They agreed that Dad could be given a sedative. It was horrible, and things got a bit worse.
The group message chat between me, my brother and my Mum) is really
tough reading as there were other family issues going on at the same
time. The private chats between myself and my brother are a reminder of the other stuff we were dealing with.
We spent Monday in the hospital, and Tuesday. The syringe driver went in on the MOnday. Mum's well meaning friend told her it would only be 24 hours before Dad died, and so Mum decided she would stay at the hospital until he'd gone. I tried to persuade Mum to go home and sleep for a bit, but she was adamant it wouldn't be long. Mum's friend was well meaning, but very very wrong.
