In other (random) news

I have needed to keep my leg elevated at night for some months now. 

It hasn't been practical to raise the end of the bed so, at the suggestion of the consultant,  I had been packing under the mattress with a princess-and-the-pea arrangement of pillows.   It has worked well,  and we taked about maybe getting an adjustable bed.

Our horrible, waste of a vast amount of money, Technogel mattresses have been bearable since I bought a fab wool mattress topper (Devon Duvets),  and we hadn't had any plans to change them at the moment.

By chance,  an ad for an adjustable frame which fits inside an existing frame popped up in my Facebook feed.   It turned out to be an American thing, and I couldn't find the equivalent in the UL.  It did make me look at adjustable beds though,  and I found that the choice was considerably better than when we last looked many years ago.

We drove a reasonable distance to check out the beds and the mechanisms and the mattresses.  The mechanisms and mattresses were fine,  but the beds just weren't up to the quality of our existing bed. 

The lovely company checked out our existing bed, and confirmed that it wasn't going to be possible to insert their mechanism into it. 

Their metal frames looked flimsy in comparison (plus one of the options we'd had meant that they were out of the picture anyway),  I can't stand divan beds,  and I'm not keen on wooden beds either.

We took a couple of days to talk through what to do.  I really liked the idea of an adjustable bed, but I didn't want to give up my gorgeous Nights in Iron bed. 

DH wasn't so sure that the mechanism wouldn't fit.  He thought that he might be able to make some mods to either the bedframe or the lifting frame to get it to work.   We decided we'd order a bed, and then DH could see if he could do anything.  He and I managed to agree on wooden bed from their range that would be an OK fallback.

 We placed our phone order.  All the bits to make the bed to our spec were available,  they had a van delivering to our area in a couple of days,  so it all happened quite fast.

As we watched them install the new bed, we realised that there was no way that our fabulous ron frame was going to work with it.    It's too big and heavy to store anywhere, so we're having to sell it.      If I ever go back to a normal bed,  my first choice would be exactly that bed again.





We've had the adjustable one for  few nights now, and it's working well.  We#re used to having 2 3 foot mattresses,  although our previous ones had a protector on to make them feel like one 6 foot mattress.  Because we are both using the head raising option, at different heights, in addition to me using the foot raising option, we've had to get separate sheets for the two 3 foot mattresses. It doesn't feel as odd as I thought it might.

We have 7 nights to confirm that we are happy with the mattresses.

 It's looking good so far.

In other (chickeny) news: BAD Big Boy

Big Boy launched his first proper attack against DH today.   

According to our original plan  they have about 3 more weeks until they go for the chop,  but it is entirely possible that they won't make it that far.  Big Boy and Long John Silver are sealing the fate of all this year's table boys.

We've agreed that we'll see how it goes.  We also need to heft Junior and the Barnies, to see what weight they are likely to be.

We're (I'm) also going to have to make a decision on who stays.

In other (sewing) news

I finally managed to clear the table AND do some cutting out.

I've made a new-size pair of leggings, waistband only basted on. in some lovely halloween scuba.   I'm waiting to see Miss Tween so we can see how they fit.

I've also made a really lovely looking raglan sleeved top.  Well, the fabric choices are lovely - glow in the dark green spider webs on a black background, for the front,  and bright green for the back, sleeves, and neckband.    However,  I printed the wrong pattern (Bella Sunshine Reagan Raglan), instead of one I've made before.

This pattern has asort of crossover V neck, which I haven't done before. It's mostly OK.  The inside is a bit of a mess,  but I keep telling myself it's only a test garment, and my next one will be better.  On the plus side,  I might not have actually made htis pattern if I hadn't printed it in error, so that's a win.

I've printed out the correct raglan pattern now (Patterns for Pirates Jolly Roger Raglan), which I've made before in a smaller size.  I've also sorted out some fabric for it,  I just need to try and get on with it before my sewjo takes another holiday.

I also had the urge to make her a Dolman sleeved top.  I looked through my enormous stash of patterns,  and the only Dolman for youngsters is an A4 version.  I don't have the energy for printing and sticking, so that won't be happening any time soon.   I did look at the adult's version,  but the sizing is too off, even on the smallest sizes.   If I can find a free or cheap PDF A0 version, I might buy it.

Pattern Emporium launched two adult tee shirt patterns recently.  I don't need tee shirt patterns (I don't really need any  patterns!),  but they were doing a special bundle discount, and if I bought other patterns I got them at lots of money off too.  So I ended up buying 5 patterns (2 tee shirts, 2 trousers, 1 shorts).

A few weeks ago I decided to print out all my A0 PDFs, to keep safe in case the A0 printer broke,  They are all hanging beautifully from hang-a-plan hangers, organised in alphabetical order.   When I was printing them, it made me confront just how many patterns I had,  and how few I had actually made.    Almost all of the patterns were for the types of clothes I'd like to make,  and most of them were bought when the designer had a sale (and after spending time  in my cooling off bookmark folder  "Patterns I'm considering Buying" ).

I then realised that pattern buying was a bit like fabric buying... a completely separate hobby to making things.   That was a very comforting thought.     It made me feel much better, and less guilty (that I shouldn't need them because of my Surefit Designs blueprint).

I'm going to have to split the adult sized patterns  into two hang-a-plan hangers.  Technically they all fit on one,  but it is blooming heavy to lift off the hook,  AND having them split onto two hangers would make inserting newly purchased patterns a tiny bit easier.  Not that I'm planning on buying any more, of course.   

If the clothes fit Miss Tween I'll take photos and post in the next couple of days.

   

Ashes

We had the expected phonecall from the Vet last Tuesday, to say that Wash's ashes were ready for collection.

I said I'd collect the next day.  So, on Wednesday,  I braced myself,  and collected the ashes.  DH was out until mid afternoon, so I did it as part of a circular tour doing errands in the morning.

It was a big box.  When Maddie was cremated 12 (?) years ago,  we had a small box which was just big enough to conain the ashes.  This was huge in comparison.    I put it on the table,  waiting for DH to get back.

Later,  we opened the box together.  Inside, there was a smaller box, locked into a cut out in the big box.  Inside that, was a plastic bag containing the ashes.   Underneath the smaller box was an organza drawstring ba which intelsf contaimed a folded plastic bag. .  We thought that maybe the idea was to double bag the ahes, and then put them in the organza bag.

I opened the organza bag and pulled out the plastic bag, to do just that. 

Inside were clippings of Wash's fur.

It was completely unexpected.

Caught unawares,  a surge of emotion.

I opened it again just now,  to take the picture.  It was OK this time.

Life goes on

My cat loving friend sent me a short but sweet email.

My other, animal loving, best friend asked lots of questions and was very kind.  Her sister, who also knew Wash, sent me a lovely message.

My brother came round while we were out.  I messaged to let him know we were 40 minutes away.  He was still there when we got home.

Miss Tween cried.  She has messaged me every night to tell me that she misses Wash.  She likes to reminisce,  it's her way of dealing with it.    I'm not ready to reminisce too much,  it's like picking at a scab.  I need to let the scab heal before I start scratching at it.

Mostly I've just been pretending that Wash is in another room.   Sometimes, the realisation that I'm not going to see him again,  or hear his loud purr,  or smell his fur, pushes through my pretence.  

This morning we received a condolences card from the Vet.   It was unexpected, and it made me cry.  It made DH well up.


There's lots of other stuff going on, and I need to keep myself under control. 

DH is keeping himself busy.   I'm trying to clear up, yet again - nothing to do with Wash's stuff.   I've been in a bit of a circular "trench" (I can't clear A until I've doneB,  I cant do B until C, I cant do D until D,  I can do E so I'll quickly do that,  I can't do F until D, I can't do G until A... that sort of thing)  and I can't summon the energy to  break the circle.   I know that the clutter is preventing me from doing stuff.... or, at least, it's giving me an excuse for not dong stuff.

Yesterday I managed some unrelated clearing up. This was stuff which is not in the circle,  it's a whole different set of stuff but it adds to the general feeling of overwhelming paralysis.  It involved clearing a spce in the utility room,  moving a large, rarely used,  electrical item out of a cupboard into the space in the utility room,  (getting side tracked into taking the another item from the utility room and spring cleaning it)   then reorganising the cupboard so some smaller electrical stuff on the counter could go in the cupboard but still be easily accessible.

This made a surprising difference and let me sort out two sections of the worktop  that they just look untidy now (rather than a mess of stuff).


On the Wash front, we've taken up his food bowl we've disposed of his opened medication; we've offered the unused syringes to a local cat charity (no one local had a diabetic cat that used those syringes).    We haven't yet removed the sharps box.

I opened the door to the front bedroom. I was only ever closed to stop him sleeping on the bed in there.

I also decided to break the circle of paralysis. I looked at the mess and resisted the urge to bin everything.   Instead,  building on yesterdays quick rearrangement,  I looked at what was a relatively easy thing to do, but would have an impact.  It imvolved me literally sweeping a load of stuff from the bed in the guest room into a pile on the floor, so I had space to work.

I'd better get back to it.  

Onwards and upwards.

Washy died today.

They kept Wash in last night.

The bloods an urine didn't show anything, but he was very poorly.

Our usual Vet was out today (he told us yesterday that he wouldn't be here). I rang at 9 and the Vet in charge of Wash told us that he had improved a little and was sitting uphe outlined what the plan for today was, and we would speak to her at lunchtime for an update.

She phoned about half an hour later to say that Wash's pupils weren't dilating in response to light, which indicated a brain injury.   She explained the options,  which were few.  We ruled out sending him to a Neurologist as we didn't want to put him through even more stuff, when the outcome was likely to be that nothing could be done.   We we agreed that we would come in at 5 to decide what to do. 

I had an appointment on behalf of ny brother at 2, and I was on my way to him just before 1 when the Vet called.  I pulled over to take the call, as it could only be bad news.

Washy had deteriorated, and she wanted us to come in sooner.  Almost now ish.

I phoned to cancel the appointment,  messaged my brother (his phone was engaged), phoned my husband,  and drove home.

We went straight to the Vets to see Wash. He barely registered we were there, apart from when we scratched his chin.   I told him all the usual thing: how loved he was, who loved him, how lucky we were to have had him in our life.  This time I added that he was going to have one more injection, and he would be pain free.  

I had wanted him to die at home.  He hated the Vets so much.  But we couldn't put hi through bringing him home.

We consented.  We said goodbye.  DH held Washy while the Vet injected through his tube;  I held DH.

Later, I messaged my other, cat loving, brother.  I did't know what to write.  In the end, I sent just 3 words.

"Washy died today." 

Wash

Wash has been having a really rough time lately.

Some time ago, he developed a limp.   It's not unusual,  we assumed he'd probably landed funny (again).  It improved a bit, and then got worse, and then got a lot worse very quickly.  We took him to the Vet.

Our normal vet was on holiday. The Vet we saw was very thorough and very kind.  She ruled some things out,  she shared her fears,  and we agreed that we'd crate him,   so we could ensure he rested his leg, give him so metacam, and we'd review in a week.

It didn't get better, despite him being crated,  so we took him in for an x-ray, to make sure that it wasn't anything sinister.    It wasn't a cancerous growth,  but there was evidence of arthritis, swe had to continue with Metacam.

He was not a happy bunny when we got him home, which is really unusual.  He gets very very stressed being left at the Vets, and normally he's really happy to be home.  He wasn't at all happy.  We assumed that his arm was hurting from being proddded and poked,  and that he was recovering from the sedation.

It didn't get better.  As time went on, we realised that he most likely hadn't been to the toilet.  (He had been outside, hiding under some bishes, dso he could have been, but we didn't think so.  We crated him again, so we could could double check what was happening, and we dosed him with Kattylax.   He did not go to the toilet, things got a bit worse, and we took him back to the vets.  

Th Vet confirmed he was bunged up.  They kept him in for the day so they could xray him,  give him an enema to unblock him, and do some some other tests. They did a blood test, and all was clear.   He came home,  he was quiet, but a little better.

It took more than a week before he got back to more like his old self - getting up on the sofa,  wanting to lie on our legs, that sort of thing.  He seemed quite well, almost his old self.  He even slept on our bed for a couple of nights.

And then on Saturday morning, he was sick after eating.  This is not particularly unusual,  although it hasn't happened for a long time.  He was sick again after eating a bit later as well.    We decided to stop the metacam, as this can cause sickness .  On Sunday, we tried him on white fish, but he was sick every time he ate, even if he ate only a tiny anount.      DH did an ear prick test, and the results were low (as he hadn't eaten) so we didn't give him any insulin.    

I put the 'Orange TV' on for him, as he really loves lying by the fire.  We wanted him to stay in the sitting room with us, so we cold keep an eye on him.

On Monday he didn't eat, and we syringed water (laced with electrolytes) in to him,  just a teaspoon or so every few hours.  He kept it down, mostly,  but he went and had drink in the late evening and was sick again;  then, in the middle of the night I woke up because I heard him being sick yet again.

So, this morning we took him to the Vet.  He did a urine test immediately, to check for ketones (which would indicate an insulin issue).  Nothing, fortunately.

We've had to leave him there so they can put him on a drip to rehydrte him, do a blood test,  and check for other things (like an infection).  he's an elderly cat, and the Vet doesn't keep them in if it's avoidable,  so we're going back this evening to see what the status is, to see if he can come home. 

Poor little man.

Sisters

It's soon to be the birthday of someone very dear to me.  I un-hibernated the embroidery machine to make her a special card this year.

The design is from Nicola Elliot, Picturestitch Designs,  and it is called "3 sisters".  In the case of my dear friend,  it represents a mum and her 2 daughters.

Blondie Bombshell

It was very windy yesterday and, for the first time,  I let all the girls into all  the garden at the same time. Up to now, the Littlees have had a few hours extended ranging in peace before I let the Ladies out into the rest of the garden.

It wasn't too bad.  There was a bit of chasing, but nothing mean.   The Littlees kept themselves in a little flock,  and moved away whenever any of the Ladies approached. 

I was also vauuming and washing floors.  Mid afternoon, I carried the sheepskin rug out into the garden with the intention of shaking it.  I didn't get that far.

As soon as I stepped into the garden, with the rug under my arm,  pandemonium broke out.   The Ladies screamed and ran for cover.  The Littles exploded into a sort of chickeny fireworkfountain,. Unfortunately, they were standing in a corner,  between the summerhouse and the fence. They exploded up the side of th esummerhouse, and up the fence.... and one of them landed next door.

I ran into thehouse to get a step-stool but, when I got back,  I couldn't see her anywhere.   DH climbed up further down the gardewn to look, and still couldn't see her.


We rounded up the hens to make sure that we had one missing; we did.  

I called her, threw a few sunflower seeds into the garden,  nothing.  Not a peep. 

Our lovely next door neighbour (LNDN) was away, so we had no way of getting in to the garden.  I suggested removing a fence panel, but DH declined.    While we considered options (including me climbingon the log store nd into next door,  borrowing a child,  waiting until the LNDN's daughter got home so we could get her to come over and let us in......      There was another complicating factor, which I can't talk about.

And then she appeared on the fence.  She was debating which way to go.  Into our garden,  back into LNDN's garden, or move a few steps and fly off into the wilderness.

I ran round the gouses to the wilderness, just in case.  By the time I got there,  she'd disappeared.   I I assumed that she'd probably decided to come down into our garden. I hadn't taken my phone, so DH couldn't phone me to tell me one way or the other.  Just in case, I checked all round for signs of her before returning home,

She was shut up in the Big Girls run,  and was as jumpy as a jumping bean.  Any noise set her off.  I tried to catch her to calm her, but it was hopeless.   I left her to it for a while,  and in the end I had to let the Big Girls in to their run, in an attempt to 'force' Blondie to let me 'save' her.  

She sat on my lap in the big run,  eating the occasional sunflower seed.   I stroked her, talked to her, calmed her down.  And eventually carried her next door to go in with her sisters.

I'm hoping she forgets that there is a whole new world next door.

Fabric-buying incontinence

After 9 months of buying virtually no fabric,  I had a momentary lapse.  My Facebook feed was the trigger,  but I shouldn't have looked.  Once I'd decided the fabric was worth breaking my ban for,  I ordered a few more pieces to make best use of shipping (well, to get free shipping).

This then led to another lapse Which led to another lapse, as I decided to order the other fabrics that I'd so carefully rejected.  Then, while I was waiting for the fabric to arrive,  I saw some fabric I knew  my sewing granddaughter would love, and I'm seeing her shortly... so that was another lapse. And then there was another one.    I have another lapse due to be delivered today or tomorrow,  and a final lapse which I've only just ordered, because it was all Christmas and Halloween stuff. Not that I have any room in the boxes for "Christmas" and "Halloween" fabrics.

Despite the apparent   incontentince,  I have tried to be discerning.   There were so many otherfabrics that I didn't buy.     I haven't looked at the website since.  

On the plus side,  I haven't had buyers remorse about any of them.   Well, I've had buyers remorse about breaking my self-imposed ban and my lack of self control,  but no buyers remorse about the individual fabrics.  They are all really lovely.

I am going to do some emergency making in the next few days. If I use some of the new fabrics up,  maybe it won't seem so bad.

Maybe.

October 2nd

Well, I didn't make anything yesterday, and I haven't made anything today.

I did manage to get a huge amount of clearing done by midnight on the 30th,  and I could have done some cutting out yesterday.   I didn't, but I could have done.

I feel OK about it.  I feel mentallly in better shape.  I feel I achieved the important part of my objective:   clearing the mess.  Insetad of sewing,  I did some other stuff.

Part of the stuff was pulling together some bits for my sewing granddaughter, including re-buying some patterns I already own to be fair to the designer.

The table is junking up again (not quite sure how it happens!), so I need to keep on top of it.